Jerry, you need to find god
i think i have herpe
just one?
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
