this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
