I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
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