there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Randomize
