I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize