Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
