Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
