Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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