Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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