That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Randomize
