The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
