I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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