Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
