Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
