had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
