the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Randomize
