I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
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