making cat noises will not fix the situation.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
Randomize