Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
