We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
