absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I'm getting married
To pizza
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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