how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
