But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I will be naked everywhere
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
At least life still wants to fuck me.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
