So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
