is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Please don't give away my fajitas
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