id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I pour the whiskey from now on
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
