fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
