Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
sarcasm needs its own font
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
