we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
