did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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