This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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