Kareoke will never be a sober sport
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Randomize
