Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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