At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
