I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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