hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
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