Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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