You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize