If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
