i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
