I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
