Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
It's official drugs can't kill me
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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