hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
