I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
