we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
