I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
