Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
