Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Randomize
