my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
What drink are we having for lunch?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
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