last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize