the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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